YogaPulse

I Moved

2009-02-12T04:09:00.000-08:00

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Inauguration Weekend, Yogi-style

2009-01-21T17:08:00.000-08:00

Check out this post on Yoga Buzz, written by yours truly about my pre-inauguration yoga activities. Did anybody else do anything interesting over the inauguration weekend? I thought I saw YogaDawg sniffing around Dupont Circle.

Uma Thurman Does Yoga?

2009-01-19T12:30:00.000-08:00

My Google alerts finally paid off. Get this:

"Uma Thurman stunned passengers by doing a yoga routine on a recent flight."

The woman did what every yogi has thought of, but has never done. Apparently, she used the flight attendant station as a prop and spent about 20 minutes doing her practice in the aisle.

The Seated Psoas

2009-01-17T06:12:00.000-08:00

It’s time for asana practice. Do you know where your psoas is?

It starts on the lumbar spine, ends on the femur, and flexes the hip. But actually feeling it requires awareness and guidance. So, why bother to dig through the recesses of your pelvis to discover your buried pair of psoas muscles?

Discovering the psoas can lead to a whole new world of asana experience. Whereas most people spend their days sitting in chairs with constricted psoas muscles, most asanas are enhanced when the psoas is released.

For example, a relaxed psoas in Baddha Konasana (Bound Angle Pose) relieves tension in the lower back and releases the knees closer to the ground by allowing the groins to open. (Liz Koch explains it much more accurately and eloquently in Release Your Psoas.)

Do you know where your psoas is? If so, what new observations has it led to in your asana practice? Any new emotional observations?

Is Mr. Iyengar Physically Fit?

2008-12-22T17:08:00.000-08:00

A couple weeks ago in teacher training, we pulled out Light on Yoga and scrutinized Mr. Iyengar’s photos.

“What do you think?” asked our teacher.

A couple students pointed out his impressive capacity for chest expansion. Then after a bit of discussion about the energy of his asanas, my true thoughts seeped into the discussion: The man has soft abs and not a whole lot of muscle tone.

But then our teacher had us look at plate 406—Bakasana. Hello, Mr. Iyengar’s arm muscles! Instead of walking around in a state of constant contraction, like most people’s idea of what physical fitness should look like, Iyengar uses each muscle precisely when he needs it.

This little lesson has started me questioning my idea of physical fitness. How beneficial are the standards I’m striving for? How sensitive and responsive am I? Can I let go of my exterior armor long enough to discover the internal workings of my body and mind?

12 Steps for Busy People

2008-12-12T05:06:00.000-08:00

It finally happened. Yesterday was the busiest day of my entire life. Suffice it to say that the day involved editing a 40-page newsletter, 2 meetings, training a new employee, technical difficulties, and projectile cat vomit.

I’ve been waiting for this day for quite some time. Rock bottom is when drug addicts check into rehab. So, I figured rock-bottom time poverty is when I’d check into the present moment. I’m the only person there so far, so I had to make my own plan of recovery:

We admitted we were powerless over our dysfunctional schedules—that our lives had become unmanageable.
Came to believe that the present moment could guide us to sanity.
Made a decision to surrender our responsibilities and our schedules over to the care of something larger than ourselves.
Made a searching and fearless inventory of our daily habits and stress triggers.
Admitted to ourselves and the blogosphere the underlying causes of those behaviors, including need for approval via accomplishment, inflated self-importance, inability to ask for help, and unwillingness to see our lives as they really are.
Were entirely ready to work to adopt a new way of being.
Overhauled our schedules and our mindsets to help replace our dysfunctional patterns.
Made a list of all people and goals to which we had over-committed, and became willing to make adjustments to them all.
Relinquished responsibility to such people and goals whenever possible, except when to do so would injure ourselves or others.
Continued to take personal inventory of our time and our mindsets and when we over-committed, promptly admitted it.
Sought through yoga and meditation to improve our conscious contact with the present moment.
Having freed ourselves from time poverty as a result of these steps, we tried to model this way of being for others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

My name is Melissa, and I am a busy person in recovery. Will you join me?

You might be a yoga geek if . . .

2008-12-10T17:21:00.000-08:00

You take pictures of your pets and/or children striking yoga poses.
There are dirty footprints on your walls.
You know words in Sanskrit that you can’t remember how to say in Spanish.
You use a neti pot.
You videotape yourself practicing yoga.
You dream about yoga.
You’ve convinced your partner that the most practical thing to do with the spare bedroom is to turn it into a yoga room.
You have a special bookshelf designated for your collection of yoga books.
You pack yoga props for business trips and vacations.
You’re considering a yoga conference or a meditation retreat for your next vacation.
You spend enough time on yogajournal.com to qualify as a part-time job.
You do arm balances at dinner parties.
Your teacher has a worn-out yoga mat and a copy of Light on Yoga that’s losing its binding, and you think it’s cool.
No one ever seems to want to carry on a conversation about yoga for as long as you do.
Your girlfriends ask you how your husband feels about all the yoga stuff you do.

My name is Melissa, and I am a yoga geek.

Thanksgiving with Strangers

2008-11-24T04:37:00.000-08:00

I’m spending Thanksgiving in Maryland with my dad, step mom, and little brother—same as last year. But this year will be different.

I’m learning about the Buddhist concept of impermanence. Most of us understand that change is happening. Life is busy. Times are changing. But how many of us feel and experience that idea rather than simply thinking about it?

The reality is that most of us don’t want to experience that truth. It’s too groundless and out of control. Rather than jumping into the current of immediate experience, we prefer to live in our mental stories, where life is more predictable. Consequently, we’re one step removed from the living stream of experience.

When we’re not part of the wild, changing, vibratory current of immediate experience, it affects our relationships with other people in a profound way. We relate to others out of our idea of who they are. We judge. We try to figure things out. We become cynical. We can’t see ourselves, and we can’t see who we’re with.

T.S. Eliot describes it beautifully: “What we know of other people is only our memory of the moments during which we knew them, and they have changed since then. We also must remember that at every meeting, we are meeting a stranger.”

This Thanksgiving, I’m making a concerted effort to get out of my head and into the moment. I will approach my relationships as a living investigation. Who is my dad really? What is my step mom about right now? What’s alive for my 4-year-old brother? I won’t just savor the pumpkin pie; I’ll savor the moment.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

Most of the thoughts in this blog came from listening to Tara Brach’s talk, "The Three Characteristics, Part 2" (available in the audio section of the Yoga Journal Community site and the audio dharma section of http://www.imcw.org/.

Anatomy Lessons from a Teacher in Training

2008-11-21T06:40:00.000-08:00

Ever wonder why you’re a natural at some asanas and completely incompetent at others? Last weekend I learned why Virasana (Hero Pose) is a snap for me and Agnistambhasana (Fire Log Pose) is a doozy. Turns out, my femur bones are internally rotated.

(Please excuse the chalky winter legs) As you can see, my thighbones angle in towards my midline and my kneecaps float towards each other. Make sense? If not, sit on the floor and try Hero and Fire Log Pose.

Now think of every other bone in your body and how each can uniquely affect your asanas. I’m not advocating that we all just throw up our hands and say, “I can’t do it; my bones won’t let me.” But maybe we could all cut ourselves some slack and realize that our ability to do a certain asana is not a reflection of our advancement as yogis.

For example, my femur bones are internally rotated and I’m sitting in a picture-perfect Virasana. My classmate’s femur bones are externally rotated and he’s propped up on a mountain of blankets in an awkward-looking Virasana. Who’s the more advanced yogi?

My vote goes to whichever yogi is focused on his own bones.

P.S. Internal rotation also makes you naturally suited for backbends and not so suited for forward bends. To see differences in actual bones, check out Paul Grilley's slide show. Here's an example of variations in femur bones:

A Few of My Favorite Green Things

2008-11-10T05:02:00.000-08:00

I went to the DC Green Festival on Saturday. Here are a few of my favorite green things from the day.

1. Seed cards
It’s not just a free yoga class pass; if you plant it, it grows flowers!

2. Free samples
I ate free samples for lunch. Yum.

3. Soy candles
Moroccan Mint was my favorite.

4. Local, organic yoga pants
I’d like a pair of EvenKeel yoga pants for Christmas. They’re made from organic cotton and bamboo and designed by DC local Liz Matthews.

5. Sweet potato chews for dogs
These are much more environmentally friendly and much less messy than the raw marrow bones my husband has been bringing home for the dogs.

6. Recycling options
Got trash? Green Fest had compost, recycling, and landfill cans.

7. Free yoga
I did a 10 minute private session with Kriplau teacher Leah Barr. All I said was “I have knee pain,” and she worked her magic.

8. Cool gardening tools
This CobraHead looking thing weeds, edges, and stirs the compost pile.

9. Elephant poo
How can you pass up a business card printed on elephant poo?

10. New connections
I spent most of the day helping people sign in for the free yoga classes. It was a great opportunity to meet new people and get to know the students and teachers from my yoga studio.

Until next year…happy green living!

Beating the Clock

2008-11-03T17:52:00.000-08:00

Last Sunday we all got a very special present—more than 24 hours in one day. After living up my extra hour of time by sleeping, doing yoga, cleaning, and goofing around (where did that extra hour go?), my concept of time has shifted a bit.

Whenever I feel busy, I automatically think that more time would solve everything. But an extra hour did absolutely nothing to heal my sense of time poverty. I’m starting to realize that expanding the clock is the last thing I need. If I had all the time I wanted to tackle my imaginary to-do list, I’d crash.

I’ve been creating a lot of unnecessary stress by resisting time. Night and day impose necessary boundaries that prompt me to expend or renew my energy. Time is not the enemy.

My Take on the Gita

2008-10-27T06:58:00.000-07:00

This weekend I started reading the Bhagavad-Gita. Even though it was written centuries ago, I found the opening to be highly relevant to my everyday life. Specifically I related to Arjuna’s cry:

My brain is whirling
Round and round,
I can stand no longer:

Okay, so Arjuna had more on his plate than I do. As a warrior, his duty was to fight. But looking at both sides of the battlefield, he saw brothers, cousins, uncles—people he couldn’t possibly bring himself to fight.

Sound familiar? Look deeper. How often do we get paralyzed in impossible situations? You know you need to leave a relationship, but don’t want to hurt the other person. You want a new job, but financial limitations keep you tied to your current job. Only you know those deep tensions that I can’t possibly verbalize for you.

So how did Arjuna handle the situation? He threw down his bow and arrows, sat down, and cried—right there on the battlefield.

Thankfully, Krishna came to the rescue and taught the poor guy some yoga, which literally means the union of opposites. No, yoga doesn’t make all problems disappear. But it does allow you to rise above situations to see the common path that lies beneath apparent conflicts.

Next time you’re in an impossible situation, do some yoga. Then maybe you’ll be able to follow Krishna’s advice to Arjuna: shake off your cowardice and stand up!

Have thoughts to share on the Gita? Join the discussion in Yoga Journal's online Yoga Study Group!

Would you kiss your teacher's feet?

2008-10-21T15:56:00.000-07:00

I just completed my first weekend of teacher training at Boundless Yoga in Washington, DC, and I can’t wait to go back for more! Where else do you get to participate in multiple three-hour discussions on yoga, do asana twice in one day, and eat lunch with a bunch of yogis?

As I head into this yearlong adventure, I’ve been thinking a lot about the teacher-student relationship. When the word “guru” came up in discussions this weekend, many of us had negative reactions. We heard that students bring Iyengar his props everyday when he practices asana and that students at Mysore have to kiss the feet of Pattabhi Jois. Although a few people drooled over the thought of delivering props to Iyengar (Pattabhi’s feet, not so much) most of us felt like that level of reverence isn’t very healthy.

As one of the teacher trainees put it: In India, it’s proper to kiss the feet of elders. But typically, the elder meets the person halfway and brings them back to an upright position before they’re able to kiss the feet. It shows reverence for the elder, but respect for the would-be foot kisser. What a beautiful gesture that captures the essence of a balanced teacher-student relationship.

In the end we all agreed that while respect for our teachers and tradition is important, honoring ourselves and our experiences is just as essential.

Could Yogis Save Wall Street?

2008-10-13T17:06:00.000-07:00

Just before 5pm last Friday, my husband and I happened to walk past the New York Stock Exchange. We had been wandering Manhattan since noon and hit a traffic jam of cameras, news vans, and tourists once we hit Wall Street. Given Friday’s horrendous dip in the stock market, the crowd had congregated to catch a glimpse of the stockbrokers leaving work for the week. Reporters snapped photos and begged for interviews. An evangelist chided the crowd to turn to God. Random people sprinkled themselves among the chaos and held signs like “No End in Sight” and “Paris Hilton for President.”

My husband and I joined the rest of the tourists and took in the spectacle while seated on a steep set of concrete stairs. There was something important going on—I could feel it hanging in the air. But I was also witnessing the drama and reactivity that perpetuate this economic mess. Instead of taking an honest look at the situation and portraying it with integrity on the evening news, the media sensationalizes the latest happenings. With our insatiable desire for drama, we eat it up and react with a disproportionate level of fear. Spending goes down, people take their money out of investments, and the economy sinks even lower.

Forget $7 billion bailouts. Let’s deploy yoga teachers across the nation to dole out free yoga classes for all. And while we’re at it, maybe the Yoga Journal editors could be in charge of Wall Street news coverage…at least until we get back into balance.

(I chickened out on my Times Square headstand and settled for Central Park instead.)

Sirsasana Mama

2008-10-06T13:10:00.000-07:00

Sunday morning I brewed a pot of coffee and sat down at the computer to browse the latest activity on the Yoga Journal Community site. This video is my latest find (watch to the end for a surprise):

On that note, where's the most outrageous place you've ever done Sirsasana (Headstand)? Mine was the 21st floor balcony of my old San Francisco apartment. I'm considering Times Square this weekend...

Just Do It

2008-09-29T10:26:00.000-07:00

Do you ever feel like work consumes your life? Whenever I feel like my job is dominating my life, I get this gnawing feeling of discontent and hopelessness. My daily schedule becomes the unrelenting master and I become the helpless victim.

Lately I’ve been reading The Upanishads before work every morning, in part trying to combat this downward spiral of thoughts. Last week I was particularly struck by this passage:

“Well may he be content to live a hundred years who acts without attachment—who works his work with earnestness, but without desire, not yearning for its fruits—he and he alone.”

So that’s what I did. Honestly, I didn’t want to get out of bed this morning and go to the office. But whenever I remember to work without attachment--to the finish, the outcome, the reward--I truly enjoy my work. I love writing. I love editing. I love midwifery and yoga. Now if I can just enjoy the dishes…

Inside the DC Global Mala

2008-09-22T14:58:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went to the DC Global Mala with Sri Sri Swami Baba Guru YogaDawg. But first we swung by the Sackler to check out the Southeast Asian and Himalayan art collection. Pier 1 has nothin' on these sculptures--we're talking 14th century, Tibetan quality.

Guru YogaDawg attended the mala undercover, of course. But it's rumored that he especially liked Alanna Kaivalya's Om-ing and that he even hung around for a few sun salutations.

It was definately a good time, but I have to say that last year's mala had more substance. Last year was half the cost, arranged by 1 studio (as opposed to this year's conglomeration of studio sponsors), and had structured dharma, meditation, and chanting in addition to the 108 sun salutations. In short, I think I just witnessed the commercialization of yoga. It's never bothered me much before, but experiencing it first-hand is kind of sad.

Was anybody else there? Any thoughts

A Different Kind of Adjustment

2008-09-15T13:54:00.000-07:00

Here’s a link to my most recent My Yoga Mentor article:
Correct with Kindness

The article was written for teachers, but on a personal note, I learned so much as a student while I was researching the topic. I tend toward perfectionism, which translates easily into my practice. Especially in Iyengar classes, I become acutely aware of everything I’m doing wrong. Adjustments from the teacher are like red Xs on a test.

But practicing that way is missing the point of asana. Yoga is not just another area of life where the goal is to achieve and progress. The purpose is to relax and unfold into the perfection that is already there on the mat. When that becomes your purpose, adjustments become cues to notice an imbalance, make a shift, and then let go.

One more thing I learned is that sometimes adjustments and verbal cues aren’t meant as corrections. Sometimes they’re simply tools to get students to concentrate and be present. How ‘bout that?

My Big Yoga News

2008-09-10T17:37:00.000-07:00

At long last, I can announce my new and exciting yoga gig. Today is the soft launch of Yoga Journal’s new online community—think Facebook for yogis. That means you can check it out now before it’s officially announced next week. Friend me (Melissa) to see what my new job is.

Here’s my favorite video from the site:

Happy socializing!

My Yoga Dog

2008-09-02T17:21:00.000-07:00

Last February, my dog Chelsea had a whopper of a bladder stone—all 3 types of possible compositions rolled into a 1-inch diameter rock. This was not good news for her beloved homemade diet. After her surgery, the vet handed me a prescription for a special canned food diet. But instead of ordering a rush delivery of dog food, I sat down with my copy of Home-Prepared Dog and Cat Diets.

I whipped out my old nutrition degree and adjusted some charts from the book to Chelsea’s weight and condition. Then I used fitday.com’s free menu analysis software to create the perfect homemade diet.

Today, 6 months later, I took Chelsea back for urinalysis and x-rays. No stones. No crystals. And no canned prescription diet.

Here’s her customized homemade diet:
1 ¼ cup cooked brown rice
¼ cup green peas
¼ cup black-eyed peas
1 hard-boiled egg
¼ tsp bone meal
1 tsp flaxseed oil

Here’s her new holistic-minded vet:
Leanne J. Lipton, DVM, CVA, CVSMT

Off the Mat, Into the DNC

2008-08-28T16:26:00.000-07:00

Given my recent obsession with mastering conscious action, I've been following Yoga Journal's guest blogger Sara Avant Stover this week at the Democratic National Convention. She's been immersed in DNC happenings and living her yoga smack in the middle of it all.

Meanwhile, I'm coming to a pause after an unusually busy month of deadlines and traveling. Although I've learned to find glimpses of peace in the midst of activity, I've also discovered that conscious activity is not an excuse for taking shortcuts. 5am mornings don't create extra hours, just extra sleep debt. Extra coffee does not equal extra energy--just more energy now and less energy later.

Suffering is Optional...Kind Of

2008-08-22T06:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had the unfortunate experience of having to ride 2 city buses to get where I needed to go. Less than 5 minutes into my trip, a pit in my stomach formed and then blossomed into a glorious combo of sickly feelings (think flu, morning sickness, food poisoning). I closed my eyes, furrowed my brow, and pressed my forehead into the side of the bus. But all it was good for was an extra helping of headache.

Somewhere between bouncing from a pot hole to an abrupt stop, I opened my eyes, lifted my head, and remembered one of Tara Brach’s mantras: don’t add an arrow to an arrow—meaning don’t make unpleasant things worse by shooting them up with your negative thoughts and resistance.

So I went with the flow. I let my head bop around and felt my insides swing to the rhythm of the road…and I still felt sick…but not as sick.

The Value of Now

2008-08-18T10:02:00.000-07:00

This weekend I experienced a powerful lesson in the value of now. I reunited with my 3 cousins after 4 years of being apart. Growing up we saw each other often, but we must have sensed that life would gradually pull us apart. The older we got, the more often one of us would pipe up and say, “We have to promise to get together when we’re grown-ups, no matter what.”

Now we’re grown up, and it took a wedding to pull us away from our daily grinds. Seeing our grown-up bodies, husbands, and kids was a potent reminder of the passing of time—one I couldn’t dismiss by abstractly claiming to be comfortable with change and impermanence.

Although my yoga practice didn’t make those emotions any less uncomfortable, it did help me to savor the presence of family. And diving into that presence made me recognize the need to realign my priorities. To-do lists come and go, but unlike family, you don’t miss them when they’re gone.

Fake It

2008-08-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

“So Melissa, have you figured out your life’s purpose yet?” said my husband’s weight-lifting buddy from the back seat. His comment was packaged as if from a peanut gallery rather than from the thoughtful recesses of his mind.

“I’m not so much interested in that part of the book,” I said in a calm, controlled manner (totally faking it!). “I’m after the part on conscious action. If I can figure out how to stay centered and peaceful in my daily activities, then I feel like I’ll finally get it—although I’m not sure what ‘it’ is.”

Another jab ensued, which I promptly met with a “shut up, you $%*$!!”

About an hour later, I stopped dead at the end of this sentence:

If you can sense an alert inner stillness in the background while things happen in the foreground—that’s it!

I can’t say I get it quite yet. But I am starting to feel it for brief periods during my days. My plan is to keep faking it until I get it.

*For newcomers, I've been reading A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose.

Worth Your Time?

2008-08-06T19:16:00.000-07:00

Dear readers,

I apologize for my sorely lacking sense of creativity and inspiration at my normally scheduled time to update YogaPulse. While I eagerly await my next creative impulse, check out these webcasts by Oprah and Eckhart Tolle, recommended by an aspiring yogini and talented backyard gardener:

A New Earth Webcasts

Let me know what you think. Are these worth your time?

News Flash: Yogini Gets Christianity

2008-08-03T18:37:00.000-07:00

I picked up A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle and so far, I'm into it. Just 9 pages in, I learned something that drastically expanded my understanding and respect for Christianity. Growing up Southern Baptist, I was taught that I was born into original sin--talk about a set-up for a negative self-image.

But sin in ancient Greek (the original language of the New Testament) literally means to miss the mark. Here's how Tolle puts it:

"...to sin means to miss the point of human existence. It means to live unskillfully, blindly, and thus to suffer and cause suffering."

I get that. Who's the schmuck who messed up that translation?

Practice Like Nobody's Watching

2008-07-30T16:27:00.000-07:00

I've come to realize how much of my life and my asana practice is driven by a desire for approval. On the mat it plays out something like this:

Teacher: "Move your right hip forward."

Melissa's Mind: "Contract entire right leg to demonstrate just how hard I'm working to move my right hip forward."

Especially in down dog, I end up like one giant contracted muscle, braced in a tangle of internal and external rotation. But at home, I let it all hang out. Since nobody's watching, I give myself room to be sloppy at first and then self-adjust out of awareness and sensitivity. And oddly enough, at home is where it all goes down--that's where I learn, enjoy, and progress the most.

So, what if I started practicing and living like nobody's watching?

Conscious Activity

2008-07-27T18:43:00.000-07:00

Have you read A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle? I haven't yet. But I hear he claims that the wave of the future is conscious action--taking the sense of presence and groundedness that we're so good at during periods of rest and bringing it into our daily activities.

The only place that I'm remotely good at conscious activity is during my yoga practice. It's the only activity that's removed from the nagging feeling that I should be doing something else or that I want to be somewhere else.

My all-consuming current spiritual practice is to live every minute like I'm on the mat.

Be the Wave

2008-07-23T18:25:00.000-07:00

I recently got hired for a new part-time, work-from-home job, which I'll be revealing here in about 2 to 3 weeks. It's very yoga-related and very exciting, so I suggest you stay tuned to my yoga ramblings.

Meanwhile, a new job means a new area to practice my yogic lifestyle. I'm busier than I ever thought I could be as a freelance writer, which is both a blessing and a challenge. To cope, I'm embracing a beautiful dichotomy I read about in Yoga Beyond Belief, by Ganga White--the standing wave.

Every good surfer knows that a gnarly ride is a swell of dynamic movement harnessed by the shape of a wave. Likewise, asana (yoga posture) offers a stationary shape to hold the fluid internal energies of breath, intention, prana (life force), etc. It's a marriage of movement and stillness.

So, I'm attempting to turn my daily life into a standing wave. It's a good subsitute for surfing and smart way to stay sane.

Image Source: A zoomed-in shot of my husband, Matt, surfing in Costa Rica.

Restorative Acro Yoga?

2008-07-20T17:28:00.000-07:00

In an attempt to figure out if I'd be a good yoga teacher, I've been using my husband as a test subject. This evening I lured him into my home office/yoga room for an introduction to restorative yoga. But by the end of the session, in a last resort effort to engage my make-shift student, we ended up in a pose something like this:

(photo source: http://www.acroyoga.org/)

And I was the base! When we first tried it out, I approached the maneuver with all muscle and no sensitivity, which left Matt earth bound and me laying on the floor laughing. But then I read the directions (as opposed to simply imitating the picture in the magazine), turned up the attentive focus, and voila--he flew.

"That's what yoga is, right there, Matt!" I said. "It's not about striving. It's about being present and perceptive enough to feel your way into the pose." It ended up being the best yoga lesson I've ever taught. And I think he got it.

Easy Does It

2008-07-16T17:05:00.000-07:00

Self magazine published an article about yoga injuries in the July issue. According to the article, yoga landed almost 4,500 people in the ER during 2006, an 18% increase over 2004. The scariest incident in the article: one woman tore her carotid artery during fish pose.

My favorite line from the article: "I adore yoga, but you have to be mindful when doing these things."

Duh!

What's Behind Your Buttons?

2008-07-12T21:11:00.000-07:00

One of the secrets to a dynamic yoga journey is to maintain a beginner’s mindset. But after practicing for any length of time, most of us are bound to develop opinions and preferences in the yoga world. In fact, may yogis develop down-right aversions to things like:

Yoga magazines

Partner poses

Yoga studio chains

Gym yoga

Yoga celebrities

Yoga scandals

My strongest aversion is to authority. Tell me I should be following a certain teacher, text, or style, and I can rattle off quotes that prove the ineptitude of anything besides my personal experience.

But lately I’ve been trying to sit with my aversions—sit with them until I feel what it is inside myself that’s triggering such a powerful reaction. So far I’ve found that when I’m comfortable and confident in my own path, nothing can shake me.

Take That, Yoga Thieves!

2008-07-11T20:09:00.000-07:00

Last spring a string of thefts hit DC area yoga studios. The same two girls kept showing up at yoga studios in DC, VA, and MD. Their tactics were astonishingly bold. For example, one girl would claim to be pregnant and demand to use the restroom. Meanwhile, they'd sneak into dressing rooms and steal credit cards out of students' and teachers' wallets so the victims wouldn't even notice their cards were missing.

Fortunately, area studios were able to band together to identify the theives' patterns and report the situation to city detectives. It looks like police are finally closing in on the suspects. And My Yoga Mentor just published an inspiring article that will hopefully help others learn from these unfortunate events.

Poor Me

2008-07-07T11:47:00.000-07:00

I am afflicted by time poverty. Despite a meager 25 hours per week of scheduled office time, my days overflow like an automatic ice machine—clear out one responsibility, aspiration, or goal, and 2 more are sure to materialize. I hit rock bottom of my time budget last weekend sitting in a Barnes and Noble café.

Peering over my stack of books (The Complete Idiot's Guide to Knitting and Crocheting, Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind, Atlas Shrugged, and my notebook full of chicken scratches), I said to my husband, “I don’t have time to learn how to knit. I want to finish Atlas Shrugged. But I don’t want to finish it ‘cause I can’t read anything else for weeks if I keep going. And I want to keep writing my book.”

“That’s your problem,” he said. “You want to do everything, so you don’t get anything done.”

So I abandoned it all and started Yoga Beyond Belief by Ganga White. My favorite passage so far? "Yoga doesn't take time; it gives time."

Here Comes the Yogi

2008-07-02T07:51:00.000-07:00

Because blogs were meant to be read, I'm ratting out YogiBride. She's been blogging into thin air for months now and needs to be discovered.

Any other yogis preparing for a walk down the aisle? Check out Portovert, a free online magazine based out of Herndon, VA for eco-savvy brides and grooms.

Yogic Family Values

2008-06-28T13:06:00.001-07:00

YJ has an especially meaty and entertaining article this month. One of the features follows a growing group of parents who are raising their children with yogic values.

Although I can't see myself reminding my future kids to meditate or dragging them to an ashram on Sundays, I know that yoga will play a role in the way I raise my family. My practice informs my personal value system, so it will probably extend to my parenting style. Does anybody out there use yoga as part of a framework for raising kids?

Articles for Teachers

2008-06-26T15:41:00.000-07:00

At your request, I've posted a link list of My Yoga Mentor articles I've written over the past few months. To balance out my ego, I've also decided to share the number of times I've been rejected by Yoga Journal magazine: 7 (and counting).

Class Clown
Energize Tired Backbends
Tools for a Spiritually Diverse Class

Download Your Dharma

2008-06-23T07:47:00.000-07:00

If you like Tara Brach’s teachings, you’ll love Dharma Seed, a nonprofit group that offers free talks and guided meditations online. Although Tara Brach is still my favorite, other teachers on the site include Sylvia Boorstein, Phillip Moffitt, Jack Kornfield, and many more in settings that range from Spirit Rock Meditation Center to the Insight Meditation Community of Washington. Teachings stem from the Buddhist Vipassana (insight) tradition and are available to stream or download.

The Meaning of Om

2008-06-20T05:03:00.000-07:00

I still remember the first time I heard a Sanskrit chant and the all-popular “om” that followed. Instead of being lulled into yogic bliss, I ran out of class terrified and wierded out.

Fast forward to 6 years later and I’m an eager participant when an “om” occasion arises. What’s the difference? I understand what it’s all about.

Om represents the subtle, unifying sound that lies beneath the profound diversity of life. It’s 200 unique voices converging in a sanctuary before meditation. It’s the hum below the metro, the MARC train, car engines, and my footsteps walking up Rhode Island Avenue.

Oprah Goes Vegan

2008-06-18T04:47:00.000-07:00

Anyone out there ever try a cleansing diet? I have, but never seem to make it past the end of the second day. Turns out Oprah has way more discipline than me. She just finished a 21-day cleansing diet free of alcohol, caffeine, animal products, and gluten. Go Oprah.

The only cleansing diet I've tried is from Baron Baptiste's Journey Into Power. It's a very reasonable plan that doesn't even involve vegetarianism. But every time I start I get this overwhelming aversion to restriction. I don't do diets.

During my most recent attempt I drank a gigantic batch of fresh beet-carrot-orange juice throughout the day. The next day my pee turned red, and I thought I was dying of kidney cancer. It was just the beets.

Meditation Demystified

2008-06-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

It’s been a year now since I’ve been meaning to meditate, and I’m happy to report that I’ve made steady progress toward doing nothing more often. But it hasn’t happened quite like I thought it would.

I started by having a meditation cushion sewing party and eagerly embarked on a 30-minute daily regimen of sitting on my homemade, rice-filled seat. That was good, but then I deflated my cushion, moved cross-country, and began adapting to life on the East Coast.

8 months later, my cushion was still neatly folded and stowed away in the closet. Then one day in the shower (of course) it hit me: It’s not about finding the time to sit. Meditation is doing what you’re doing—showering, shaving, walking to work.

So I started paying attention in short little bursts throughout my days. It wasn’t an effortful doing; it was remembering to relax into whatever was happening in and around me. Pretty soon I refilled my meditation cushion (we all know rice isn't getting any cheaper). Then I started sitting again.

Now sitting is both a luxury and a practice. Meditation is a lifestyle.

Cashier's Guide to Cloth Bags

2008-06-10T15:30:00.000-07:00

This mini guide was inspired by my local DC Safeway, otherwise known as the UnSafeway.

How not to respond when a customer asks you to use her cloth bags instead of regular plastic grocery bags:

1. Ask if she wants to buy the cloth bags. See torn corners, sticky bottoms, and faded lettering for signs of previous use.

2. Proceed to put items in plastic bags and then place them inside the cloth bag. Customers bring cloth bags in order to avoid using plastic bags.

3. Stand by idly while the customer hurries to swipe card, enter pin number, and bag groceries. Cloth bags do not excuse you from your regular job.

4. Hurl a rude comment at the customer when you accidentally put the first item in a plastic bag. Rarely will a customer appropriately identify the time after the previous customer has finished being served and you begin bagging her groceries.

5. Ask if she put the cloth bags on the counter because she wants you to use them. This is what the customer may do when she does not feel like dealing with any or all of the above inappropriate responses.

Enlightenment for Idiots

2008-06-10T14:06:00.000-07:00

At the suggestion of YogaDawg, I finally picked up a copy of Anne Cushman’s new novel Enlightenment for Idiots and devoured it in a week.

The Story
In the opening chapter, Anne throws you into the chaos of the protagonist’s life. Amanda, a yogini and struggling writer in the middle of a complicated relationship, gets an unexpected call to travel to India and write a manuscript called Enlightenment for Idiots. Chaos and an engaging plot inevitably unfold.

The Scoop
Not only is Anne’s novel a good story graced with humor and wit; it’s also packed with simple, accessible insights into spirituality and life. The further I read, the more I found myself pleasantly surprised as I began to pick up on the symbolism and layers that Anne weaved into her story. 357 – 358 were my favorite pages, but I can’t say why without giving the story away. Suffice it to say the scene gave me tingles in my head and almost made me burst into one of those awkward happy-sad cries.

YJ recently posted an interview with Anne. Cupcakes and Yoga also did a great interview with her. Check out http://www.enlightenmentforidiots.com/ for more.

Can We Coexist in DC?

2008-06-02T05:11:00.000-07:00

Seven people were killed in DC between Friday night and Saturday morning this past weekend. A 66-year-old man was fatally stabbed in his car just two blocks from my house.

When the weather first started warming, people trickled into their front yards and onto their neighbors' porches for evening chats. But now the thermostat is pushing into the 80s, and I've been watching people's emotions heat up and clash in the streets. Friday night a domestic spat, a street fight, and maybe a bad drug deal escalated into the tragic loss of seven lives.

We have got to learn how to coexist in the world, starting with DC.

The Power of Practice

2008-05-26T14:10:00.000-07:00

It’s Memorial Day. I’m approaching the end of a long weekend of swimming, gardening, cooking, and napping, and the last thing I need is my regular Monday night yoga class to help me unwind from the day. Something more will have to draw me to the mat tonight.

When I first ushered yoga out of the classroom and onto my living room floor, I discovered the power of practice. Just by showing up regularly, I began to notice tiny shifts—an opening feeling in my hips during Eka Pada Rajakapotasana (Pigeon Pose), a lengthening in my spine during Tadasana (Mountain Pose).

It culminated the day I stopped climbing onto my arms and instead effortlessly rose into Bakasana (Crane Pose). Daily practice and daily shifts brought me into poses I thought were impossible for my physical abilities.

The power of practice that I so vividly experience on the mat is what keeps me showing up in life, in writing, and in marriage. I set my intention, show up, and prepare to be pleasantly surprised by what the present moment brings.

Off to class I go.

Home-Made Props

2008-05-04T06:34:00.000-07:00

I stooped to a new low in my selection of yoga props. This week in my home practice, I really needed a block. None of my books were fat enough, so I ventured into the kitchen. After a brief scan, my eyes locked onto a Saltine cracker box.

The reason I so desperately needed a make-shift yoga block is because I learned a new tip for Parivrtta Trikonasana (Revolved Triangle Pose). Turns out you're supposed to activate your inner thighs, which is a lot harder than it sounds. I can squeeze my inner thighs with no problem during Tadasana (Mountain Pose). But once I'm down and twisted in revolved triangle, I completely lose control of those muscles unless I have a block to squeeze.

Bread crumbs, anyone?

Yogini Goes Gardening

2008-04-27T17:20:00.000-07:00

I have a new appreciation for food. This weekend I dug out my granny cart and set off to Home Depot for dirt. My mission--an organic garden in my backyard.

Twelve hours, four trips, and five open blisters later (while wearing gloves!) I had half of my envisioned garden cleared and covered with healthy dirt. Meanwhile, my overambitious selection of plants--tomatoes, zucchini, squash, cucumbers, green beans, bell peppers, eggplant, strawberries, and an assortment of herbs--sat on the walkway patiently waiting for a forever home.

I woke up this morning determined to finish. But on my fifth trip to Home Depot, sadly, my granny cart bit the dust. The front wheels flew off the axle and rolled across the road behind me. Luckily, I had my husband nearby to drag the peat moss the rest of the way home.

Tonight I'm going to bed pining for a hybrid car to haul my dirt with visions of summer vegetables dancing in my head.

Want to learn more about how food is made? Check out http://cookingupastory.com.

The Upside of Cycles

2008-04-08T16:31:00.000-07:00

After 7 years of yoga, I’ve come to accept the normal ebb and flow of practice. Some weeks I’m on my mat nearly every day for over an hour at a time. Other weeks I head for spinning class or my basement sofa more days than I’m comfortable admitting. Every once in a while I curse my cycles and swear to a life of regularity and structure. But that’s not how I or anyone else is designed to function.

Our lives literally depend on variety. The human heart’s tendency to continually adjust its rhythm and vary the amount of blood it pumps is vital to the body’s stability over time. Any doctor will attest that a healthy heartbeat displays erratic leaps on a monitoring screen that are true to a remarkably stable pattern over time.

Maybe we’d all be better off ignoring our inner micromanaging critics and embracing our normal responses to daily life.

A Mat Made in Heaven

2008-03-29T05:51:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I went to 2 yoga and poetry panels at the Split this Rock poetry festival. Here's my meager, raw attempt at poetry:

A Mat Made in Heaven

We met in college on a Friday afternoon
I was ready to loosen up and hear some relaxing tunes
Truth be told, I was tired of the same old routine
I wanted a bit of fun, maybe break into a new scene

I stepped in the center with minimal expectations
The teacher warmed us up with a few sun salutations
I walked away feeling lighter and open
With a “namaste” I vowed to come again when I can

The next Friday I came back for a second round
My mat had an uncanny way of getting me unbound
On the mat I was liberated, foot loose and fancy free
My lanky legs and arms began folding into me

My balance grew steady and my muscles gained strength
My waist and my spine stretched to full length
Gradually, my mental defenses melted away
As I visited my mat day after day

But the greatest gift came when I brought my mat home
My spirit woke up and ceased to roam
The divine began seeping in through the edges,
Transforming my soul with physical poses

Today my mat calls me to presence in Vrksasana
And opens my heart during Bhujangasana
Finding God on the mat has been like falling for my best friend
And discovering my true love that has no end

Wake Up at Work

2008-03-10T13:54:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to Borders in search of poems by David Whyte, a writer I discovered through one of Tara Brach’s audio dharmas. The fiction and poetry shelves were dead ends. An author search led me instead to the business and money management section—a section that usually makes me want to yawn and gag simultaneously.

Here is the story that made me buy the book, Crossing the Unknown Sea: Work as a Pilgrimage of Identity:

Late one night, David found himself in conversation with a stranger who was a landscape gardener and self-taught expert in woodlands. Impressed by the stranger’s combination of knowledge, imagination, and articulation, David asked how this man had discovered his immensely satisfying profession. One sip of brandy later, the stranger confided that it all started with a suicide attempt.

Years ago, the stranger had become so weak and malnourished from drug abuse that when he decided to end it all, he lacked the strength to make it out the window, over the unkempt flower box, and down the 12 stories to his death. Instead, he landed facedown in the flower box in the rain.

The stranger had no choice but to literally give up all of his striving. As he lay in the mud, he saw a trickle of rainwater moving through the center of the box. Focusing his attention on his immediate surroundings, he began to move stray sprouts, carve river branches, and form miniature mountains. The profound sense of connection he experienced that day while working his own ground on a very small scale, later transformed into a successful landscaping career.

Ready to appreciate the full taste of this wonderful insight? Here is the poem that sent me in search of David Whyte in the first place:

The Well of Grief

Those who will not slip beneath
the still surface of the well of grief
turning downward through its black water
to the place we cannot breathe
will never know the source from which we drink,
the secret water, cold and clear, nor find in the darkness glimmering
the small round coins
thrown away by those who wished for something else.

by David Whyte from Close to Home

Rest for a Better Planet

2008-03-08T06:08:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning in a fury of typical weekend plans for self, home, and life improvement—buy more paint, start work on a new room, peruse craigslist for bargains on more stylish furniture, continue making headway on my freelance writing projects, and maybe do yoga if I have any energy left this evening.

But a 20-minute video I just watched changed my mind. The Story of Stuff is a light-hearted approach to our overwhelming problem with consumption. It reminds us that at the center of our planet’s environmental crisis is our insatiable appetite for something better.

Going deeper, we are grossly unable to rest in what is. Instead of accepting normal wear and tear, we buy new furniture. Instead of patiently waiting for our local strawberries to grow, we ship them in from Costa Rica. Instead of allowing our bodies to rest and heal, we go to the doctor for medicine. Instead of working through our relationship problems, we break up and find a new relationship.

We tumble through this perpetual story of out with the old and uncomfortable, in with the new and better. In all our improvement madness, we forget that what we long for is already here.

I think I’ll go brew a cup of morning coffee and rest on my used couch.

Keep the Faith

2008-02-26T16:34:00.000-08:00

Another lesson from the mat just hit me over the head in my daily life. I spent the entire afternoon wallowing in a self-induced state of doubt. One too many rejected manuscripts turned into a crisis of faith in my ability to put words together in an intelligible manner. When the vet called to let me know my dog needs surgery to remove a calcium oxalate stone from her bladder, I hung up the phone and launched into a worried frenzy over whether I should be feeding commercial pet food to my animals instead of my homemade food. In short, I lost faith in myself.

What if every time a yoga instructor told me to straighten my back leg in Warrior I, I collapsed into child's pose and questioned whether I’m worthy of practicing yoga at all? It sounds silly, but that’s what I’ve been doing in my daily life for a couple weeks now.

P.S.—I apologize for not posting the rest of my top 10 favorite blogs. I was too busy doubting my ability to make informed decisions in life.

Is Yoga Your Religion?

2008-02-11T15:07:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time, I was a fundamentalist, evangelical Christian. Growing up that way brings me to the yoga world with a unique perspective. Confession—the Undenominational Yoga Association is actually a reincarnation of the Undenominational Church, which started as a joke in my family’s backyard.

Let me explain something about the evangelical Christian world, and see if you recognize any correlations to the yoga world. There are Southern Baptist, Independent Baptist, Methodist, Presbyterian, Lutheran, and Alliance congregations. I have heard many a sermon about those people who just go to church for Christmas and Easter and weddings and funerals. I was also told countless times that I could not have a healthy spiritual life away from the church and qualified religious leaders.

Now that I have found my way to a healthy spiritual life, facilitated in large part by yoga, it pains me to see yogis lamenting the commercialization of yoga. I understand the frustration of watching someone not get it. But Americans need exercise, stress relief, community, and spiritual connection. If they come away with any one of those from a yoga class--wonderful!

Another person's inability to grasp the full scope of practice does not prevent us from enjoying our own deep, purposeful, personal practice. It is through acceptance and gentle guidance that we nudge people along on their personal paths. If yoga had stayed in India in its "pure form" and never made it’s way to my college campus and my first sincere teacher who couldn't even balance in tree pose, I never would have found my way into the personal practice I have today.

Also, I have appreciated several yoga teachers, videos, and books over the past 8 years. But ultimately my yoga path has proceeded according to my personal readiness and study. No guru showed me the way. And who’s to say there is one way? The road is not straight and narrow. It is wide and accepting.

And with that, I now announce #6 in my top 10 favorite blogs: Diary of a Bad Buddhist.

Worth Your Time

2008-02-09T07:50:00.000-08:00

GroundingThruTheSitBones has passed an E for excellence blog award on to YogaPulse. As official acceptance of the award, I now pass it on to my top 10 favorite bloggers.

1. Teacher Tells All: A talented, blossoming teacher for teens, great writer, and sincere yogini.
2. My Third Eye Itches: YogaDawg makes me laugh and has been closely involved in the promotion of the Undenominational Yoga Association.
3. Beginners-Mind: A unique look at daily life, laced with humor and admirable writing style.
4. Food Karma Alert: Get informed and take action towards responsible, healthy eating.
5. DarrenMain: His book, Urban Mystic, prompted me to look beyond the borders of my sticky mat while lounging under a palm tree in Costa Rica.

Stay tuned for 6 through 10.

Backbend Buzz

2008-02-04T14:38:00.000-08:00

While researching my latest article for My Yoga Mentor, I stumbled onto a useful piece of yoga info. Most yoga poses stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation and rest. But backbending poses activate the sympathetic nervous system, which prepares the body for action.

Here’s what it means for your yoga practice and your daily life: Starting your day with backbending poses may be just what you need if you have trouble waking up. As you bend back, you squeeze the adrenal glands and pump a bit of adrenaline into your system. Some instructors even say you can successfully swap your Starbucks for a healthy backbending series.

But as with coffee, moderation is the key. Too dramatic of a bend through the lumbar spine (lower back) squeezes the adrenals too hard and leads to an unhealthy amount of stress hormones in the blood. Eventually it sets the body up for anxiety and depression.

For healthy backbends, be sure to engage the core muscles, lengthen through the spine, and draw down through the lower ribs. Read more here.

Purposeful Pain

2008-01-28T04:51:00.000-08:00

“Homebirth midwife requests c-section!” That’s how Cara Muhlhahn, nurse-midwife from The Business of Being Born, describes the moment when she truly felt she could not go on during the birth of her son. It is at that moment, when the pain is so intense, that a woman turns outside of herself and looks to be rescued.

But here’s the thing—a woman’s body knows how to birth. No one else can do it for her. Many times all a woman needs is a supportive attendant to hold her hand, look her in the eye, and say, “Everything is okay. You can do this.”

I learned this from a four-hour conversation I had over the weekend with Cara and a group of midwives at my office. It ultimately made me consider, how many of us have the courage to birth our dreams? It’s hard, it hurts, and it’s not always glamorous. On a personal note, I feel like I’m at that critical point right now. I have this dream of writing things that will change people’s lives. I don’t quite know how it will manifest, but I feel the contractions.

Part of me wants to call in the doctor for a nice cushiony salary or at least a shot of something to get me through the ups and downs of the writing life. But then I imagine the reward of holding my baby someday (perhaps a book?) and knowing I did it.

Back to our hypothetical birthing woman. If the woman pushes through to the finish, her body releases a flood of feel-good chemicals (endorphins), leaving her with a sense of euphoria and setting the platform for intimate mother-child bonding.

We have such an aversion to discomfort in our society. Too often we miss the joy and empowerment of moving into and through our discomfort.

Being Durgananda

2008-01-22T14:27:00.000-08:00

Ever wonder how Yoga Journal decides on their columnists? As a budding writer and yoga enthusiast, I often questioned who this Sally Kempton, Durgananda person was who kept popping up with loads of insight. My speculating naturally turned to criticism, which evolved into plans to usurp her column and claim it as my own dream project.

Then a story from The Best American Spiritual Writing 2004 put me in my place. The story turned out to be about Sally Kempton, not written by Sally Kempton. Turns out she began her career as a successful journalist writing about feminist issues for Esquire and The New York Times. But she gave it all up to live in ashrams and study the Siddha Yoga tradition. Nearly 30 years later, Kempton returned to modern culture and began writing a monthly column for Yoga Journal magazine, among other impressive ventures.

So that's how she got that column. I stand humbled.

Why Practice Matters

2008-01-20T06:27:00.000-08:00

Yesterday morning I was flipping through my digital subscription to Plenty Magazine. It's all about living green and keeping tabs on innovations that may put the brakes on global warming.

But something hit me by the end of the short takes in the front section. Most articles touted scientific inventions. Then I thought, "Are we counting on the same technology that brought us motorized vehicles, air travel, and a fast-paced lifestyle of convenience to dig us out of our carbon muck?"

Maybe it'll happen. Or maybe the United Nations will pass some sort of world-wide agreement that will put an end to global warming by the time my first grandchild is born.

But is it prudent to pin our hopes on maybe? I say, let's do yoga.

Seriously. If everybody practiced yoga, everybody would develop into more compassionate, present, mindful individuals. Think of the magnitude of change possible if every person made more compassionate, present, mindful choices in daily life. That would put the brakes on global warming.

To their credit, Plenty Magazine has a feature article called "Monkeying with the Message," which highlights the importance of individual action.

A Note to Yoginis and the Yogis Who Love Them

2008-01-18T09:17:00.000-08:00

For 2 months, I've been working as a part-time editor for the American College of Nurse-Midwives. From the first week, these women radically changed my views on pregnancy and women's health. Here are the top 6 things I've learned so far:

1. Choosing a nurse-midwife to attend your birth does not rule out pain control. Nurse-midwives use ice, warm showers, distraction, emotional support, massage, and when requested, epidurals to ease a woman's pain.

2. You can have a nurse-midwife as your care provider at home, in a birthing center, or at a hospital.

3. Mothers and their partners can "catch" their own babies during labor.

4. Most women get their information about pregnancy and birth from magazines, books, and films that are infiltrated with messages of fear. (For great alternatives, see The Business of Being Born on Netflix in February, Mothering magazine, and books written by Dr. Bob Sears.)

5. Nurse-midwives are trained to listen to women, be with women, and empower women through all stages of life.

6. Nurse-midwives are advanced practice nurses who can provide primary care to women from adolescence through menopause. That means you can have a nurse-midwife now, even if it's just for your yearly checkup.

New Year, New Yoga Association

2008-01-05T06:17:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of YogaDawg, I am proposing the first ever undenominational (pronounced un-DEE-nominational) yoga association.

Rule 1. No certifications allowed.

Rule 2. No shoes allowed. (sticky socks are permissible)

Rule 3. You must practice whichever style of yoga feels right to you on a particular day. If no style feels right, you must make up your own.

Rule 4. No criticizing other members of the undenominational yoga association for food/beverage choices, pose preferences, wardrobe collections, or creative props.

Rule 5. You only get to read Yoga Journal if you take what you like and leave what you don’t like. Otherwise, you must write your own yoga reading materials.

Rule 6. If one or all of rules 1 – 5 are violated, the association must gather for an emergency intervention. The member in violation of the rules must stand on a chair, surrounded by at least 10 other association members who are designated as sponsors. The member in violation must then place his hand on the seat of his pants and pull his undies out of a wad.

Please let me know if you’re interested in joining.

Oh the Places You'll Practice

2007-12-26T13:04:00.000-08:00

As 2007 comes to a close, I thought it would be appropriate to reminisce over the places I've rolled out my yoga mat in the past year. They range from exotic to mundane:

*Arena Treck, a gym in Escazu, Costa Rica
*21st floor balcony overlooking San Francisco
*Yoga Tree in San Francisco
*Yoga Journal's staff office
*My living room
*My empty, under-construction 2nd bedroom
*Unity Woods in Washington, DC
*The DC Global Mala
*Hot Yoga in Washington, DC
*My dad's home gym
*My mom's sitting room, decked out with a gong, fountain, and metallic Buddha picture
*8th floor balcony of a moving cruise ship
*Wedged between a blaring tv and a treadmill at my father-in-law's house
*Private patch of carpet in my 14-year-old brother-in-law's bedroom

Where have you practiced in 2007?

Here's to the places you'll practice in 2008!

Wherever You Go, There You Are

2007-12-17T15:49:00.000-08:00

My most recent insight came to me while I was lounging in the sun on a toasty Caribbean cruise (a pleasant memory I’m now recalling amidst the frigid 20-something degree weather we’re experiencing in DC).

As I was flipping through the pages of the latest issue of Yoga Journal, my husband tossed and turned in his chair, rattling off ideas of more exciting things to do. My mind drifted, as usual, and I pictured my in-laws bustling to two bingo sessions and an art auction on the lower decks. In short, we were all being very much ourselves somewhere in the middle of the Caribbean Sea.

“You’d think we would act and feel a little bit different being so far away from our daily lives,” I said to my husband. “But we’ve all managed to find a way for our routines and ways of being to manifest even out here in the ocean.”

It’s easy to give over too much power to our external circumstances. My common traps are I would be happier if I didn’t have to work and I’ll be 100% fulfilled if I become a successful writer.

More often than not, the only thing standing between me and happiness is my Self.

Audio Dharma

2007-11-15T11:55:00.000-08:00

If you’ve been keeping up with my sporadic musings for the past few months, you’re familiar with Tara Brach, author of Radical Acceptance. Now you can listen to Tara speak, courtesy of the Insight Meditation Community of Washington.

I’ve been listening to 1 or 2 talks every evening while I prep my basement walls for a fresh coat of paint. My favorite so far is “What You Long for is Already Here,” about halfway down the list.

Check it out while you’re doing a mindless task, or when you get the precious opportunity to do nothing at all.

Change for the Better

2007-11-06T12:58:00.000-08:00

This week I’m taking a hiatus from life and enjoying the Florida sun in the company of friends and family. I came with my yoga mat in tow. The change of scenery has refreshed my practice and my self.

I’ve taken the opportunity to think of ways to change up my practice for when I feel the need to be jolted out of mindless routine back home. Here’s what I came up with:

1. Start by standing on my head (after a few warm-up sun salutations)
2. Unroll my sticky mat upstairs instead of downstairs
3. Drop in at a new studio
4. Play music I would never think of using for a yoga session

Any other ideas out there?

The Scary Chair

2007-10-31T06:12:00.000-07:00

About a month ago, I tried my first forearm balance. Next the instructor suggested we all attempt forearm balance with a chair placed between us and the wall.

As the rest of the class experimented and played, I sat frozen on my knees, staring at the chair. I surveyed the possibilities of doom scrolling through my head. Would I do A.) a cannonball into the chair, B.) a belly-flop on top of the chair, or C.) a combination of both A and B?

A few minutes later, a girl with spiked hair grabbed the legs of the chair next to mine. “This is really great,” she said and kicked up against the wall. “Have you tried it yet?”

“I’m afraid of the chair,” I confessed.

“HA!” she laughed. “At the very least you’ll do a face-plant.”

My classmate’s humor jolted me out of my fearful trance. I recognized the chair for what it was—an inanimate chunk of metal. Then after a few trial kicks, I joined her in inverted bliss.

Happy Halloween!

Laptop Yoga

2007-10-24T13:40:00.000-07:00

I recently discovered a wonderful practice perk for tech-savvy yogis. From the mountains of Wyoming, Yoga Today broadcasts daily yoga sessions led by certified instructors. Each session runs a healthy one hour and includes sequences inspired by styles like Anusara, Ashtanga, and Vinyasa.

I watched a hefty chunk of an Ashtanga video and was pretty impressed. Adi Amar, the instructor, used neutral but inspiring language. My favorite was “open yourself up to something greater” during upward dog. She also provided detailed pose guidelines and occasionally quoted the Yoga Sutras.

If you can get past the random insect buzzes, helicopter whirs, and slippery mats that are bound to happen in a daily Web cast, it’s not too bad. How refreshing to see a company make yoga accessible and free, instead of sinking into commercialism.

Will Work for Organic Food

2007-10-08T09:26:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went to my first ever green festival. It exceeded my expectations and left me inspired to step up my environmental efforts. Here are just a few of the reasons it’s worth the $15 if green fest comes to a city near you.

1. Free Dirt. Last year’s green festival trash got recycled and turned into free compost for this year’s participants.

2. Tyler. I met my first real live farmer.

3. Trance Dance. Balance Yoga Studio led a trance dance on Saturday. We warmed up with basic poses and moved on to free flow, all with fun music in the background.

4. Yoga swings.

5. Cool speakers. Graham Hill (founder of TreeHugger.com), Andrew Kimbrell (author of Your Right to Know: Genetic Engineering and the Secret Changes in Your Food), Hunter Lovins (Time Magazine’s 2000 Hero of the Planet), Frances Moore Lappe (author of Diet for a Small Planet), Ralph Nader, and many more.

6. Free Samples. Chocolate, coffee, tea, juice, energy bars, soy jerky, hemp milk, smoothies, licorice, lotion, soap, magazines, pens, pencils, organic suckers, pet food, catnip, bumper stickers, and more.

Now that I've attended, I'm going to try out some new local, organic grocery stores, sign up for a free rain barrel from the DC city government, and fix my leaky faucets. Do you have any creative ideas to reduce the size of your carbon footprint? Please share!

Style Crisis

2007-09-26T10:06:00.000-07:00

I skipped Iyengar class this morning and fled to a vinyasa flow studio (aka Shiva Rea style) that I discovered at the Global Mala. My teacher would have been appalled. There were bent back knees in warrior I, curvy spines in downward dog, and slanted hips in splits.

But I ended up being a tad bit disappointed. Instead of feeling the flow I felt last weekend, I felt more like a fish out of water, flopping about on my mat with no structure. To compensate, I fixed my gaze directly on the instructor and attempted to mimic her every movement.

I’ve grown weary of Iyengar with its rigid rules, but I think I may have gone too far in the other direction this morning. I’m longing for a community that clicks with my inner yogini and having trouble finding one.

Reading entries from fellow bloggers out there, I know this is a common dilemma. Has anyone else gotten through it successfully? Any pearls of wisdom for a struggling compadre?

Nothing is Wrong with You

2007-09-24T08:59:00.000-07:00

I’ll be posting more frequently this week thanks to the many insights I experienced at the DC Global Mala yesterday. Where to start . . .

Tara Brach, author of Radical Acceptance, was my favorite speaker. She’s one of the leading proponents of Vipassana meditation in the DC metro area, a real gift for those of us who live here.

Her guiding philosophy is to love what is. She says we all develop strategies to compensate for what we think is wrong with us – addictions, perfectionism, etc. What happens is that we eventually believe that we are our strategies and forget who we really are.

Why Most People Can’t Love What Is

Loving what is is a radical departure from our culture’s norm. In fact, most of us are actually afraid to accept what is. We believe that if we accept what is, what is will get worse and send us in a downward spiral.

How do you love alcoholism or writer’s block or a destructive relationship? Aren’t these problems that we’re supposed to fight and hope to overcome?

The Solution

Tara says that these are perfectly logical fears, but ungrounded in reality. In truth, loving what is frees us to change. Fighting what is is full of contraction, strain, and anger. Loving what is is open, relaxed, aware, and maybe vulnerable or confusing.

Whatever the case, loving what is creates space for genuine happiness right here and now. It allows for awareness to perceive the subtle cues about what step and in what direction to go in this moment.

Try it Out

Here's what Tara had us try at the DC Global Mala:

Sit in a comfortable seated position on the floor or in a chair. Notice your breath, the sounds in the room, and the sensations on your skin.

Bring to mind a problem that you’ve been struggling with lately. Now ask yourself, “What is happening inside me?” What about the problem is bothering you? Sit long enough to go beyond the first answers that pop up.

Next ask yourself, “Can I be with this?” In the first step you noticed. Now accept and release.

Fun in Level One

2007-09-21T11:36:00.000-07:00

This week I was sent back to Level I. My teacher says it’s the best move to get in good with John, aka the god of yoga on the East coast. My regression has led me to 3 insights for the week:

1. Level I is way more fun than Level III. Don’t get me wrong – headstands and handstands are all fine and dandy. But in Level I, people talk to each other. They make jokes, laugh at themselves, give it their all, and want to know your name.

2. Tadasana (Mountain Pose) is hard! Who knew the backs of your thighs are supposed to be lifted in tadasana, not to mention your knees, quads, inner arches, and just about every other body part.

3. The ultimate goal should be to achieve the abilities of a Level III student and maintain the mindset of a Level I student. Enough said.

Ahimsa in Action

2007-09-14T07:23:00.000-07:00

Part of being a yogi is learning ahimsa, or nonviolence towards self and others. Where it gets tricky for most of us is in our daily food choices. It seems that many yogis tend to view food choices on a moral spectrum that goes something like this:

Meat eater = Bad
Organic, free-range meat eater = Okay
Vegetarian = Good
Vegan = Best

But I’d like to propose an alternative perspective. As yogis, let’s respect each other’s food choices and realize that we each put thought into what we eat. Let’s bring awareness to the impact our choices have on animals, the environment, and our bodies. How this manifests in each person’s diet is bound to be as varied as the styles of yoga we practice.

Here’s what my proposed view looks like in real life, excerpted from an actual conversation that took place in my early days as a Yoga Journal intern:

Me: “So is everyone in the office a vegetarian?” (I grip my paper bag concealing a tuna fish sandwich)

Erica: “Oh, no! We have meat eaters, vegetarians, vegans, the whole works.”

Jessica: “Well, I only eat animals that don’t have a limbic system. Did you know alligators don’t have a limbic system?”

Erica: “I don’t eat chicken. It’s usually fried anyways and that’s not healthy.”

Ann: “I eat meat. I eat everything. I mean, who’s to say plants don’t know what’s goin’ on? I think they do, in their own way.” (Ann chomps down on a big bite of green salad.)

Me: “Huh.”

*This entry was inspired by a recent discussion on the Yoga Buzz blog and a previous personal entry on my myspace blog.*

Persevere Gently

2007-09-07T13:06:00.000-07:00

It’s been a hard week. Nothing bad has happened necessarily. But, as I told my husband this morning, the gerbils in my head are doing battle with each other.

Working from home has its advantages. Casual Friday is every day. I can conduct conference calls and interviews with a kitty snuggled close on my lap. Yoga hour can happen at any hour. But when the words just won’t flow out my fingertips and onto the computer screen, there’s no one around to squeeze them out or chain me to my chair until the work gets done.

This week I’ve made the mistake of stiffening up and muscling through my days. As a yogini, I should know better. Progress on the mat doesn’t happen by sheer force. Most of my growth occurs when I manage to surrender my fear and expectations. I empty my mind and relax into poses.

Today I remembered to surrender to the present and persevere gently into my goals. I let go of attachment to what I want to be doing or think I should be doing and instead gave way to what needs to be happening in this moment.

Are you forcing yourself into a wobbly Sirsasana (headstand) to no avail? Maybe the kindest thing to do for yourself and your mastery of the headstand is to go back and learn Sarvangasana (shoulder stand) first.

No Drop Outs

2007-08-30T13:36:00.000-07:00

I didn't want to go back to class this week. The teacher hurt my feelings. The students criticized my favorite magazine. I pretty much realized I was in a classroom full of humans. It happens.

But my teacher's impressive array of yoga knowledge drew me back for yet another week. "I don't have to like her. I just have to listen to her," I thought.

Class was hard. It was inversions gallore. We waisted no time and went straight into handstands. Then we moved on to forearm balances, which I've never done before. As if that wasn't enough, we moved on to handstand drop overs - do a handstand and let your feet drop over your head to a slanted board on the wall.

I was not going to do that.

After a sufficient amount of time wrestling with a chair and toying around with headstands, I remembered I used to do front handsprings when I was a teenager. I loved front handsprings. Handstand dropovers are almost the same, just more controlled. So I did it.

"Oh my god, that's beautiful!" one student gasped. It really wasn't that graceful. The board made a not-so-subtle sound when I landed. But whatever I did must have been pretty. My criticizing teacher even complimented me on my manuever.

Everybody made me feel so good! I'll probably practice even harder this week than last week because I came away from class feeling good about myself. The real trick will be when I can practice the same regardless of the comments I hear in class.

Judging Yoga

2007-08-22T10:09:00.000-07:00

I am a self-professed yoga snob. In my mind there are people who do yoga and people who think they do yoga, but don't. There are people who get it and people who don't.

As I sit here on this dull, drizzly afternoon, I'm considering renouncing my elitist attitude. What's the catalyst? Iyengar yoga.

I've attended class often enough to discern between constructive criticism and outright judgement. Criticism is an inherent part of Iyengar yoga. But I don't seem to remember reading in Light on Yoga that certain studios are substandard and certain books are inferior.

The problem is that in Iyengar yoga, there is one right way to do every pose. And if it's not in Light on Yoga, it's not considered a real pose. Any variations are a magnet for criticism.

I knew this part of Iyengar yoga existed. Now I have met it. And I'm going back to class next week.

She Wears Short Shorts

2007-08-14T13:44:00.001-07:00

I expect to be officially welcomed into the Iyengar Yoga club by this time tomorrow. I bought a pair of short shorts.

Last week I showed up to class in my cute new Lucy pants with floral embroidery just above the calves. I waltzed in fantasizing about the warm welcome I'd receive as such a stylishly-dressed newcomer. So imagine my surprise when the teacher asked suspiciously, "Does Richard let you wear these pants to class?"

It turns out Richard is on the lenient side of the Iyengar Yoga spectrum. This teacher is not. She made me roll up my pants so she could adequately criticize the alignment of my knees. It was such a shame to have to hide that cute floral stuff at the bottoms.

After the traumatic experience, I'm done with pants. It's shorts for me. And I don't mean the running shorts or the roll-down waist band shorts with the floppy side panels. Nope. I'm talkin' B.K.S. Iyengar old school, tight-tight shorts.

Can you see my alignment now?

Iyengar vs. Vinyasa

2007-08-11T07:21:00.000-07:00

This week I found myself in a new city and in a new school of yoga. My husband and I moved back to our house in DC. On the recommendation of Yoga Journal staffers, I looked up Unity Woods, one of the best Iyengar studios in the country.

Iyengar yoga is all about the details: rotate your thigh out, your foot at a 45 degree angle, lift the knees, root the femurs…you get the idea. I’ve sampled some Iyengar throughout my time as a yogini, but it never grabbed my attention like the swooping flow of a Vinyasa sequence.

3 months later after studying with Richard Rosen and just one class at Unity Woods, I’ve developed a newfound respect for the style.

I suspect that Iyengar yogis are living out the saying, “God is in the details.” They have a keen eye for subtleties of movement and breath that I have yet to acquire. Iyengar yogis are acutely in tune with the source of the flow that I’ve been thoughtlessly riding on as a Vinyasa junky.

I think I’m ready to turn in my snorkel and try my hand at scuba diving.

Church for Yogis

2007-07-16T20:13:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went to the best yoga class ever. The 6:30 Friday evening flow class at Yoga Tree in the Castro is where it went down. Knowing that it was likely to be the best yoga class ever, I was dressed and ready to go ever since 1 P.M that afternoon.

The class ended up exceeding my expectations. I quickly realized that “bring a towel” meant bath towel – not cute little kitchen towel. In a gymnasium full of people doing a pretty intense physical practice, my mat soon turned into a sweat-powered slip-n-slide.

But this class did more than satisfy my craving for a good, bendy workout. At the same time it was incredibly spiritual and fun – go figure. The teacher called it happy hour. She teased us telling us to curl up in a ball and cry like a baby (at times I wanted to!). And then seconds later she’d be urging us to feel the energy, the qi, the je ne sais quoi.

We also did this series of chanting that made it feel like a church service for yogis. We did a continuous om, everybody repeating it whenever they ran out of breath. And we sang Krishna Das, which was absolutely beautiful. All my home sessions with Krishna Das in the background finally paid off. I actually knew the words and could sing along.

I think I understand now why somebody would want to go to church every week and sing hymns and listen to a sermon. That method doesn’t really do it for me. But whatever I was in touch with during my weekend yoga class is probably what they’re after.

Where was your best yoga class? Why?

Yogi on the Loose

2007-07-09T11:38:00.000-07:00

It’s come to my attention that the majority of my blog entries have been a tad bit on the serious side. I’ve always had a tendency to take my self and my endeavors a little too seriously. And after all, yoga is kind of a serious practice.

Thankfully I’m surrounded by a refreshing crowd of people who add a sense of humor to my life and my practice. One yogini in particular, who shall remain anonymous for undisclosed reasons, helped to open up my funny bone this past weekend. Let’s just say it involved one too many board games, beverages, and four-letter words that were definitely not Sanskrit.

Now before you boycott me in the name of Shiva and a host of other gods and goddesses, let me offer a statement in my defense. In the words of Aristotle, “moderation in all things.” And even in moderation, moderation.

Dealing with Distractions

2007-07-01T20:15:00.000-07:00

If you have a home practice, you're familiar with distractions. Some of my favorites include my adorable barking dogs who double as security alarms, my orange kitty who likes to nuzzle at inappropriate times, and my charming husband who has the uncanny ability of knowing exactly when not to push my buttons and then does it anyway.

The days when my pets are passed out on the couch and my husband is tucked away in a downtown office building are my favorite times to roll out my mat. It's easy to feel present when nobody else is vyying for my attention. But I have to admit, my times of distraction serve as a more realistic practice for daily life.

The Indian spiritual teacher Osho summed it up well. He contended that it is flawed to meditate only in the mountains. You should also meditate in a busy marketplace, he said. In other words, can you emmerse yourself in the world and maintain your center?

Sun Salutations: A Doorway to the Divine

2007-06-24T10:52:00.000-07:00

I used to hate sun salutations. The repetition bored me. The effort tired me. They were a necessary evil to get to the fun stuff of a class.

But then I met Cuca. Cuca loves sun salutations. In fact, she often waxes eloquently on the subject smack dab in the middle of class. The woman taught me more about sun salutations than I ever wanted to know, all under a tin-roofed Costa Rica yoga studio in Spanish.

Now, mind you, I can barely speak a complete sentence in Spanish. But one day I decided to tune in to the ill-timed lesson instead of fantasizing about headstands and complex balancing poses to pass the time. I watched as Cucca demonstrated sun salutations with and without mental focus. I soaked up the passion in her voice and thought, “There must be something really important here.”

Soon I began practicing sun salutations in my free time at home (there’s a lot of free time to go around in Costa Rica!). With presence in the equation, the repetition lulled me into a meditative state. The extra breathes and drops of sweat coaxed me out of my mind and into my body.

Sun salutations became my entrance into the deeper aspects of yoga. I learned that no pose is ever just a pose. There is something to do with every tiny muscle, the direction of your gaze, the timing of your breath, the tilt of your pelvis. You can’t help but be acutely aware and engaged during yoga.

Here’s a challenge for the week: Pick a pose that you absolutely hate. Commit to practicing it daily for a week. Watch and see what comes up.

Meaning to Meditate

2007-06-20T08:07:00.000-07:00

You come to your mat at least 4 times per week, 6 times on a good week. You enthusiastically embrace a good 5 to 15 minutes of Savasana (Corpse Pose) after class. So who has time to add meditation to their practice?

I’ve been meaning to meditate for quite some time now. I know the techniques, the best sitting posture. I’ve even been contemplating making my own meditation cushion with buckwheat hulls and a sewing-talented friend. But when it comes to sitting down for a solid 30 minutes and focusing on absolutely nothing, well, I can usually think of better things to do.

When I’m doing yoga I’m already practicing a sort of moving meditation. It lassoes my thoughts and slows them from their sprinting speed down to the steady pace of a Sun Salutation. But I know the next step is to sit with my thoughts—face the present in all its messy entanglements and penetrate down to the underlying stillness.

Maybe today will be my day to quit my meaning and start my meditating.

What’s keeping you from meditating?

Toward a Healthy Spirituality

2007-06-17T17:38:00.000-07:00

I once read a book with a poem that went something like this:

There was a mother who wanted to keep her son close to home. To keep him from venturing into town, she told him ghosts lined the road.

When the boy became older, the mother needed him to attend to some business in town,
But the boy would not leave home for fear of the ghosts.

So the mother decided to give the boy a medal.
“This medal,” she said,” will protect you from the ghosts.”

Bad religion gives faith in the medal.
Good religion shows the ghosts don’t exist.

In other words, good religion should put us directly in contact with ultimate reality, the universal divine. When religion fails to lead to a healthy sense of spirituality, it ends up giving way to a shallow, powerless series of rituals.

Although yoga isn’t meant to be a religion, it can be a wonderful way to bypass the medals and fears associated with many of the world’s religions. Its philosophies and practices are intended to link us directly to the divine.

In fact, yoga is based on the observations of yogis from over thousands of years. Yoga is unique as a spiritual practice in that it involves no blind faith, no fears or conditional approval. Instead, it is a practice of experience based on love and acceptance.

How has yoga enhanced your religious and/or spiritual practice?

What Your Dog can Teach You about Dharma

2007-06-10T17:13:00.001-07:00

Although dharma is a pretty loaded term, with roots in no less than four religions, the dharma I’m talking about is the Sanskrit word meaning “right way of living.” It’s often used to describe a person’s duty on earth, or spiritual calling. So what does your dog have to do with dharma?

Despite my best intentions, my dogs have never mastered the art of heeling. They get a little excited when it’s time for a walk. Who wouldn’t be thrilled with a mild San Francisco wind fluffing their white curls, whiffs of stale trash hovering overhead, and the prospect of roaming free at the local dog park just over the next hill? If dogs have a dharma, this must be it – living in true harmony with their inner canine nature.

But it’s not enough for my dogs to embrace their walking dharma. They tug and huff the entire mile. Chelsea sputters random smoker-like coughs, while Napoleon resembles an enthusiastic gallows victim, his tongue nearly dragging on the ground. “It doesn’t have to be so hard, guys,” I tell them. But we all know dogs have a limited vocabulary – bone, ball, walk, poop.

We can no more escape our personal dharma than our dogs can escape a leash on a walk (barring any major mishaps). My dharma involves writing, being a doggie mom, and living in San Francisco. Yours could be surfing in Bali, working in New York City, or loving your cat. When we live in accordance with our dharma, we proceed more quickly towards enlightenment – something like the human equivalent of dog park.

They say dogs and owners are frighteningly similar. Maybe that’s why I tend to muscle through my yoga practice, write until my brain turns to mush, and do it all over again the next day. Sound familiar? Perhaps you’re more like a pleasantly plump pug, needing pulled and coaxed to even get out the door.

Here’s what walking my dogs taught me about dharma today: Go with the leash. Find a comfortable balance between resting and striving. When you’re following your dharma, you should feel very little resistance. After all, you’re just following your inner-most nature. There’s nothing in the world you could possibly do better.

If I were a Saint

2007-06-09T18:34:00.000-07:00

I would want to be known as the hugging saint. So when my supervisor at Yoga Journal announced she wanted to see Amma, the hugging saint, but had no one to go with, I threw up my hands and said, “I’ll go!”

6:30A.M. Saturday morning. “This hug better be good,” I think, as I fumble through fluffy covers and over my warm, sleeping husband to wage war with the snooze button. But my Yerba mate latte and pile of fresh summer berries refreshes my enthusiasm. Naturally, I move on to the next thought, “What does one wear to meet a hugging saint?”

Amma is an Indian woman. At 21 she swore off marriage to devote herself to the physical and emotional needs of humanity. Ever since, she’s been traveling the world, tirelessly doling out hugs to millions of people. Some are Hindu, others Buddhist, Christian, or Muslim. Whatever you believe, Amma will give you a hug.

This is not the occasion for my Strawberry Shortcake t-shirt. I settle on jeans with a knitted pink sweater, grab my sandals and go.

Erica shows up in her happy yellow Beetle. Together, we navigate Google maps, make a few illegal u-turns, and fend off the impatient drivers of the world. Soon we’re at the ashram where Amma will be giving her hugs. The parking attendants are calm, friendly, and intuitively more skilled at customer service than any public function I’ve ever attended. They effortlessly coordinate hundreds of cars into Shiva and several other appropriately-named lots. We shuttle in groups to the Shiloh-West temple.

Just as I’m taking off my sandals to enter the temple and await my hug, nature calls, probably thanks to my morning Yerba mate latte. I look over my shoulder, see the line of port-a-potties, and decide I can hold it.

There are a lot of people who want hugs from Amma. Erica and I squeeze into an empty space on the floor. This is obviously not a get-your-hug-and-go type of event.

The woman sitting to my left successfully distracts me from my screaming bladder. “I just feel so, ahh!” she expands her hands in an outward reaching arch, palms towards the sky. Her gaze seems to be coming through a telescope from another planet. She’s out there. Over the next few minutes, she proceeds to tell us how she felt called to drive to the BART station, load as many people into her truck as she possibly could, and deliver them all to Amma for hugs. Her passengers are to my right and shrouded in saris. I’m surrounded.

10 AM strikes, and in walks Amma. She’s draped in white, walking quite regally (as a hugging saint should), and brushing people’s palms as she heads to her white seat at the front of the temple. An Indian man steps to the microphone and begins the group meditation session, “Sit with your spine straight.” Yeah, right.

Erica is fortunate enough to have space for a full lotus posture. I make do with one knee in the air, the other to the side, and my spine jutting into the poor man behind me. But an unexpected calm hovers over the room. It’s a different kind of crowded than a sticky amusement park line or a violent concert mosh pit. I don’t mind so much that Erica’s knee is poking my thigh. And the woman to my left doesn’t seem phased by my protruding elbow.

We belt out a few om’s in unison. A child leaves screaming, shaken by the fervor. I’m reminded of the time I ran out of a yoga class, pinching back tears, overwhelmed by the energy of hearing a Sanskrit chant for the first time. Today, I feel at peace.

The hugging begins, but only if you have a slip of paper marked C4. I am group G5. My bladder forces me to swallow my pride and head for the port-a-potties.

As I head down the path towards my destiny, I soon realize these are not just any port-a-potties. In fact, these are the cleanest port-a-potties I’ve ever laid eyes on. Just think if everybody were as considerate and kind as Amma’s followers. Imagine the potential cleanliness of port-a-potties world-wide!

After the deed is done, I wash my hands at the outdoor foot pump. I drift out of my port-a-potty bliss and find that I’m standing next to a lake with two glorious trumpet swans and a smattering of pink lotus flowers. I also hear soothing music, but can’t identify the source. If I'm losing my mind, this isn't so bad.

Reluctantly, I turn toward the temple, tiptoeing through the crowd and back to my tiny space. The idea of a meditation cushion has never sounded so appealing as it does now. Two more hours slip by, and finally my group is called. Erica and I meander tentatively to the start of the darshan line. Darshan is what Amma calls this whole business of hugging.

We wait in line on our knees, shuffling two-by-two down the isle. It’s customary to sit or kneel when Amma is in the temple so as not to obstruct anyone’s view. Amma is now a mere three people ahead of me. I’ve been preparing for this moment since the break of dawn. “Do I hug Amma back?” “Do I ask Amma a question?” Do I give Amma a gift?”

All this fuss over a simple hug is a bit much, I think. Amma is hugging Erica. I am next. I don’t want to hug Amma. I feel myself pulling back, like in that yoga class years ago. Then Amma draws me into her robes; gently, but firmly. Her thick arms wrap around my waist. A subtle combo of incense and new baby doll smell wafts through my nose. Amma hums a Sanskrit blessing in my right ear. I think she’s shaking a little.

I would shake, too if I had given hugs from 7:30P.M. yesterday through 8:00A.M. this morning. An article I read in USA Today reported that Amma hugged 75,000 people in 23 hours, 20 minutes on her birthday three years ago. This woman is a hugging monster!

Turns out Amma doesn’t just give hugs. She also gives kisses. Chocolate kisses, and a rose petal with her blessing. Erica resolves to save her kiss for her sleeping boyfriend. I, however, am shaking with hunger. I think I’ll keep my kiss to myself. My sleeping husband can have a hug.